"Squirrel" wrote in message
...
On Fri, 20 Jan 2006 18:02:13 -0800, "Daniel Morrow"
wrote:

Bottom posted.
Gail Futoran wrote:
"Squirrel" wrote in message
...
[snip]

who wears the pants in your house??

Your comment above was unnecessary.
Marriage is a compromise.
Cindy was doing her best for her fish.
Her decisions might not be your decisions
or mine, but I'm not so perfect that I'm
a candidate for godhood. Are you?

Gail

Squirrel might have mean't the opposite as even I seemed to take in from
cindy's talk that her husband is TOO bossy and might even be a know it
all,
it might be appropriate for cindy to be bossy towards her husband about
this
as this is her baby. If you're right gail I apologize for this
over-defense
of squirrel (I don't remember if squirrel is a carol sock-puppet or
whatever
but I feel his/her opinion was misread). Good luck and later!

I (female from NZ) felt Cindy did everything her appearing bossy
husband said despite it beiong contrary to advice given by others, to
the point of the fish possibly enduring suffering.'
------------
To clarify the situation: One day about a year ago, my husband came home
from work with a 1 gallon aquarium and 2 fish that someone from work
apparently didn't want anymore. At the time, I didn't want an aquarium,
seeing that we already had a dog and 4 cats, but he insisted on keeping it
and said he would be solely responsible for it. One of the two fish died
right away. He went to the local Petco to find out what happened (and with
the intention of replacing the fish). The clerk explained to him that a
1-gallon tank couldn't possibly sustain 2 fish and not to replace the fish
unless he intended to get a larger aquarium. So, he did not replace the fish
and just kept the 1 fish in the aquarium for an entire year, taking sole
responsibility for the fish, feeding the fish every day, changing the water
etc.

Then, maybe a month ago, he felt that he wanted to move to a larger aquarium
and get a second fish. That's when he got the 10-gallon aquarium kit, set up
the aquarim according to the instructions that came with it, and got a
second fish. He was taking care of both fish for several weeks, and they
seemed fine. Then, one day (about 2 weeks ago), it seemed like the original
fish was having trouble swimming. I looked at it and saw that its tail and
fins looked ragged and it just looked ill. That's when I started doing some
internet searches for information. I phoned the Petco, and they told me the
fish had fin and tail rot and to treat the tank with tetracycline, and
that's also the same time I found this group. That was the point that I
first took interest in and responsibility for the fish and determined to try
to save the original fish (but unfortunately failed). At my request, my
husband made an extra trip to PetCo to get the water testing kit plus better
fish food (and the goldfish book). He turned off the heater when I asked him
to (without an argument). I made 2 more trips to PetCo to get the
antichlorine tablets and the salt. All in all, between the two of us, we
made 3 or 4 trips to Petco and spent over $50 trying to save the fish. And
after we did all that and the fish still died, my husband basically said
"Enough is enough. The tank is a murky mess from the tetracycline. We've
spent a fortune on supplies. We're talking about a $2 goldfish here. Let's
stop all this nonsense and just get another fish."

So, in summary, the fish was his from the beginning. The hobby was his. I
had zero interest in any of this until 2 weeks ago when I decided to try to
save the fish. My husband went along with all of it, but simply reached a
point where he said enough was enough. He previously stated he was going to
replace the fish tomorrow, but sometimes, his bark is worse than his bite. I
would be willing to bet the fish will not be replaced until I agree to it,
and he has agreed to ask the clerk at Petco if the fish tanks are treated
for parasites before buying another fish and dumping it in our tank. He has
threatened to scrub the tetracycline out of our current tank, but hasn't
done it yet (after I warned him about disturbing the biosphere). But the
reality is, when you're married, you pick your battles. I'm glad he's not
pushing the issue, but if he did go to the store and replace the fish, I
certainly wouldn't divorce him over it.
Best regards,
---Cindy S.