You raise an interesting point about control.

Gregory Bateson noted that 'You cannot not communicate.' I have often
observed that there comes a point in many decisions where no decision
is in fact a decision. Faced with a decision, you cannot not decide.

I think the discussion of control by moderation and control by constant
conflictual or demeaning remarks falls into a similar category.

I wonder what it is about launching conflictual remarks that reaches so
deeply into some people? The anger reflected in some of the
conflictual posts seems to be anchored way down and to lash out with
much more energy that the triggering post demands. In some ways it
seems like the static electricity that we experience on wool rugs: it
builds up inside and then zaps whomever comes near when it has built
up.

Jim